Pregnancy, Blogging and the Real Possibility of Job Loss

Yep... I am pregnant. Still a long way to go to get to the stage of the lady in the picture, but getting there, sure enough. And, now you know why I have been absent from the blog for so long :) I tend to sleep a lot these days... and all those of you who are bloggers know that the need to sleep a lot and the addiction to blogging just cannot coexist. So, I had to prioritize and decided to walk away from the blog. Cold turkey. Believe me, that isn't an easy thing to do when you have spent pretty much every free minute during the past year obsessing over your blog. And the blog is finally grown to a point that it is getting some recognition and earning some side income. But hey, you've got to do what you've got to do, right?

Frankly, I have no regrets. Over the year, I have complained on and off that the blog was beginning to feel more and more like work. Some of the articles were written more out of obligation than the real interest to write. I was actually starting to get stressed out that I had a deadline to post and the article was not ready yet or that the quality of the article was poor compared to some really great articles put out by so many great personal finance bloggers! As if that wasn't enough, my mood was being controlled by what and how Google chose to tweak their algorithms - one day I was flying high because my predicted PR was 5, and the next day I was down in the dumps since the real PR had crashed to 0! As though all that was not enough, the blog was beginning to make some real money, and when money is involved, perspectives have a tendency to get very skewed. But now, with all that out of the way, I am free to write when I really want to and blabber on like I am doing right now :)

All kidding aside (pun intended), just around this time two other events occurred at work which made the decision necessary. First, I have been wanting to get on a high visibility, high profile project for the past few months and an opportunity presented itself for me to take a jab at it. This project is a great chance for me to prove my mettle to my current employer and to chart the course for my future career. It is in line with the reason why I chose to work for this company in the first place. And I just had to take it. It wasn't easy dealing with the prospect that I could be pregnant soon, and take on more responsibility at work at the same time. But I was beginning to get stuck in a rut with my current project which is fairly dead-end career-wise. What's worse, this project could go on forever and I would have no chance to get out of it until I pulled myself out of it by the ends of my shoelace! It seemed like a "now or never" moment and I decided to go for it. Even though it is hard to admit, blogging would be a huge distraction if I really have to give to this project what it requires.

The second event was far worse. Our CEO announced that he had put our division on the market for sale, and it came as a complete surprise to many of us! Of course we had heard some rumors before, but none of us paid any attention to it, since it was just too inconceivable. Now, with fresh rumors floating that one of the suitors is a Chinese company whose sole motivation to buy is to obtain the market share, and that most employees would be let go, it seems like the job loss is imminent. I now had to get on that other project and earn as much experience as possible on the new project before looking for new jobs, if I want my career to go in the direction that I hope for. My only hope and prayer is that, because of size of our company, the whole split/buy out/merger will drag on for a while, and I will have the time to have the baby and the experience on the new project before having to look for a new job. Keeping my fingers tightly crossed.

As I mentioned briefly before, the blog was starting to make some real money just before I decided to call it quits. In the month before I quit, the income from this blog was a little over $400. And that is no chump change! I was really tempted at one point to let the opportunity to get on the high profile project at work slip by, and focus on taking this blog to the next level. That way, if I lose the job, I will have another outlet to continue bringing in some income. But frankly, I don't see myself as a professional blogger. And realistically, the odd name of this blog will limit the scope of how big it can be. And finally, I just am not cut out to quit the conventional thinking ("poor dad" school of thought?) of preferring a steady paying job in favor of a risky dream/fantasy option. Ideally, I would have wanted to hang on to both - the opportunities at work as well as explore the opportunities with the blog, and see how things go. But with the baby on the way, and my body demanding rest, I just had to make a decision and stick with it. And I choose to go with the conventional, prudent thing to do. If I have to take on some stress, I might as well take it to further my career. Maybe blogs (and other Internet based hobbies) make thousands of dollars to some of their owners, but I just have to wait for the time to be right for me to indulge in such hobbies. Like I said, you've got to do what you've got to do, right?

Someday, I will come back and revive this blog. Or may be start a whole new blog. Or heck, maybe do something else entirely different and turn myself into a millionaire :) But for now, I will just stick to posting random ramblings here and hope someone will stop by from time to time to read them :)

*Image Credit: ABC News Article [via Google Image Search]

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